It sure has been a while since I’ve sat down to write an article for you guys. Between some health issues and my super packed schedule working for Affinity Magazine, it’s been rough trying to find a good time.
As many long time readers know, back in November I was diagnosed and began treatment for severe ADD/ADHD. This involves me waking up everyday and taking a medicine that is designed to help me navigate my daily life as a pseudo neuro-typical individual. Despite the great things medicine has done for me, there are side effects; the most prominent being drastic weight loss. Before starting treatment, I was 120lbs of solid muscle. After years of struggling with body image issues and self-hatred, I had finally accepted myself, started taking care of my body, and absolutely loving myself. So it really truly sucked when all of that came crashing down around me these past few months.
Not many people are aware that some ADD/ADHD medicine also completely restricts your appetite. I mean COMPLETELY. I could be starving and eat a single almond and become full. So as you can imagine, I lost weight really, really fast. At my lowest, I was a few pounds below 100 and extremely weak. I stopped going to dance practice and eventually, all of my other extracurriculars. It’s a miserable way to live.
But more miserable than losing 20+ lbs of weight that I needed, was the countless people telling me, “I wish I could lose weight as fast as you”, “It must be nice being able to eat whatever you want”, and “Stop complaining! You have it easy. I would kill to be skinny like you.” These words really got to me. You need to realize, fat is ENERGY. Fat is life. And not all fat is bad. Without fat, my body simply can’t function. These past few weeks I have really contemplated switching, or completely quitting my medicine. But as a junior in High School, the demands of school don’t leave much room for self care. Additionally, ADD/ADHD presents behavioral issues that would prevent me from interacting regularly with others. So basically, I can’t quit.
But I have been taking steps to gain my health back for sure. I’ve started going back to dance practice and gradually stretching my stomach by eating regularly to be able to fit more food without getting sick. It’s definitely not a comfortable process but it’s a necessary one. Eventually, I hope to be in a place as healthy as I was before I began taking medicine for ADD.
For now, just remember that there’s way more to everyone than what’s on the surface. And, not everyone’s healthy is skinny.
Until next post,